Human beings have desires. It’s part of what it means to be human. We want all sorts of things: some are good and some bad; some we’re happy to own up to, while others are closely guarded secrets; some we’re barely aware of ourselves. The thing is, what we want, what we really want, is what drives us.
James warns us that, “each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death” (James 1:14-15). If we are Christians, we will know that sinful desires must be resisted – greed, lust, malice and so on. What we may not know is that wanting something good can also lead to sin. How is that? The problem is not what we want, but wanting it too much.
So, for example, as a pastor, I naturally want our church to thrive and grow. That is a good thing. But I can want that good thing too much, so that an originally good desire actually gives birth to sin. The desire begins to control me and drive my behaviour. I grow anxious and fearful when we are not obviously growing. I start hiding the facts, or pretending things are better than they are. I’m terribly hurt when someone chooses to leave the church. I see other pastors as threats, and so on. So, it’s not enough to ask ourselves, “What do I want?” We also need to ask, “How much do I want it?”